‘He feels like she “deserves” to stay on the plan because they were together for a long time’: Newlyweds remove brother’s ex from a four-seat family Spotify plan after she freeloads for a year and a half after their divorce

Author image for Etai Eshet
Etai Eshet • Editor
Sep 14, 2025 6:00 PM EDT

A freshly married couple sits down to clean up bills and finds a hitch in the family Spotify math. The plan has four seats, the husband pays the annual bill, the brothers reimburse, and one extra spot went to the middle brother's wife back when they were together. 

Fast forward a year and a half post‑divorce, she never paid back this year's renewal, and the new spouse can't be added because the ex is still sitting in the chair. So the admin does what admins do: removes the ex, adds the spouse, and tells the middle brother to pass the message along through the same lawyer‑approved channel everyone agreed to during the divorce. Cue the argument. The middle brother is mad because now he has to poke the bear, says she "deserves" the slot since she was around for years, and insists this was just to save a buck.

Advertisement

  • AITA for removing my sister-in-law from the family Spotify plan?

    Cheezburger Image 10552687616
    via fizkes

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • I got married a couple weeks ago, and we're in the process of merging our finances. This includes going through all of our subscriptions to reduce redundancy and sync our bills.
    via Toasted_Lizard
  • In doing so, we realized that my husband's brother's ex wife is still on his Family Spotify Plan. Because she is, we can't add me.
    via Toasted_Lizard
  • My husband started the family plan about six years ago, for himself and his two older brothers. It allows him to have four separate accounts in the plan,
    via Toasted_Lizard
  • and the cost per account is lower than paying for them individually. When the plan was created, each brother got an account and the last account went to the middle brother's wife.
    via Toasted_Lizard
  • Cheezburger Image 10552687872
    via KinoMasterskaya

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • The plan is under my husband's name, so he is the administrator. He gets billed annually and the others reimburse him for their share.
    via Toasted_Lizard
  • At the time, this made perfect sense. They all saved some money, the middle brother was the only one with a spouse, and although my husband and I had been together for about a year at the time,
    via Toasted_Lizard
  • I was about to start grad school so I could still get the student pricing and thus had no reason to join the plan.
    via Toasted_Lizard
  • Now, it makes less sense. I'm out of school, we're married, and the middle brother got divorced about a year and a half ago.
    via Toasted_Lizard
  • Cheezburger Image 10552688128
    via Ekateryna Zubal

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • We can easily afford to keep my separate Spotify, but we also realized the ex never paid my husband back when the plan renewed this year, so we agreed it made more sense to remove her and add me in order to simplify our subscriptions.
    via Toasted_Lizard
  • So that's exactly what my husband did. He deactivated her, joined my Spotify to the plan, and texted his middle brother to let the ex know.
    via Toasted_Lizard
  • We didn't text her directly because she became extremely volatile during their divorce so the brother asked our whole family not to contact her directly so all communication could flow through a specific moderated messaging app that their lawyers recommended.
    via Toasted_Lizard
  • This has caused a family conflict. The middle brother is mad at us because he feels like we're forcing him to have another fight with his ex just so we could save a buck.
    via Toasted_Lizard
  • It's true that she will definitely be set off by this. Plus, he feels like she "deserves" to stay on the plan because they were together for a long time (aka, longer than my husband and I).
    via Toasted_Lizard
  • We can definitely see how it sks for him to have to reach out to his ex, and inevitably her off.
    via Toasted_Lizard
  • On the other hand, the oldest brother agrees with us. She can't stay on their family plan forever just to avoid a conflict, it's healthier to sever these last ties,
    via Toasted_Lizard
  • she chose to leave the family (divorce was her call) so she gave up any family- related benefits, and there are logical reasons for me to join the plan now.
    via Toasted_Lizard
  • So, internet strangers, AITA for asking to join my husbands family Spotify plan, and thereby forcing his brother to have a conflict with his ex?
    via Toasted_Lizard

  • Reality check. A family plan isn’t a lifetime achievement award, it’s a discount owned by the person who pays the bill. If someone’s no longer family, no longer paying, and blocking the spouse from joining, keeping them on isn’t kindness, it’s a quiet subsidy. The oldest brother gets it: clean the hooks, align the plan to the actual family, and stop letting fear of a blowup run the budget. The fix stays simple and boring. Send a neutral heads‑up that access changed, suggest her own account or a plan she controls, and if the middle brother wants to float her temporarily, he can do it on his card, not the administrator’s. This is housekeeping, not hostility, and it keeps merged finances tidy.

Want More? Follow Us and Add Us as a Preferred Source on Google.

Tags

family drama inheritance brother spotify mother tradition siblings family feud favoritism wedding aunt in laws mother in law sister fiancé grandmother Father
Scroll Down For The Next Article